I show sober women how to build the confidence they need to pursue their desires beyond recovery.
July 11. It’s Sunday and the waking up wasn’t easy. My body has been sore and exhausted. More validation of how out of shape I am and how much I have let myself go. I spent some time meditating about all the people in the world that wake up feeling that way all the time. How challenging it must be to not feel good all the time but what’s worse is not really knowing you don’t feel good.
I was planning to go to the gym today since I didn’t workout yesterday and I was ready for some resistance training. For some reason (maybe a God wink here), I left that house way to early as the gym doesn’t open until 8am.
On the way there I had the thought of doing another 30 minutes. I figured I could go for a run and then use the gym to stretch and do whatever feels right at that time. Unexpected but I’ll go with it.
I set out with a podcast to keep me company along the way. It was The Armchair Expert interview of one of my personal heroes, Oprah Winfrey. She is an incredible woman with a traumatic past and a huge success story. In fact, that’s what her new book is all about. It’s next up in my audible playlist!
It was hot and humid this morning and I had to pee. No worries I can make it to the port a pot and turn around.
The first half of my jog went well. I was optimistic, feeling pretty good. After the turn to head back, the podcast episode hit me with some powerful stuff.
Oprah says “You teach people how to treat you”, which sounds a lot like something say on a very regular basis to myself and my clients, “You get what you allow”. Same difference with a HUGE impact on our lives when we make the changes necessary to create healthy boundaries and make ourselves a priority.
People will continue to ask you or treat you certain ways because you keep letting them. Drop the mic please! This is the stuff of real confidence building. Dang I am getting it done on this run!
And then I got triggered and took a little walk down active addiction and early sobriety memory lane. PSA, our triggers are for us to deal with. They are indicators that something has not been resolved inside of us, something hasn’t been healed. It is our job to do the work on that, not or others to change their ways for us. Personal responsibility is a huge part of emotional sobriety and living well beyond recovery. And it’s a missing link in our society at large today for sure.
She went on to talk about how OUR opinions about things are just as important as anyone else that we ask. I’ll repeat for all the people pleasers and indecisive women out there. Your opinion of a thing, no matter what it is, who you marry, what shoes you buy, your job, what vacation to take, what car you buy etc. is just as important as anyone else that you will ask.
Whew, this was soooo me. I can remember early on in marriage constantly wanting to call my parents to ask about certain things. And not just in a mom daughter/friend type of way. And how hurt my husband would get when I did that. He didn’t understand why I didn’t trust him. Boy I wish I had gotten that sooner.
I felt like I has having a lot of Oprah Aha moments today. I also know that God positions us exactly where we need to be with just the right people at every moment of our lives. Feeling like I’m doing some kind of work today and it is good.
Oh, also the run ended up ok as well. Nothing spectacular, I finished it. I wouldn’t go to the extreme of saying I was proud of myself (still only 30 minutes including a pee stop) but there was some more self-love, like at least I did something.
I used the gym to stretch with some yoga flows and ruminate on the teachings I had just absorbed from one of the most famous female icons in modern society. I wanted to do some weight training, but wasn’t feeling it. So I chose to walk for another 10 minutes and call it a day. I felt a little disappointed that I didn’t challenge myself to do more.
I was recently exposed to the #75HardChallenge. If you aren’t familiar with it click the link it will tell you everything. It’s an intense mental challenge that involves physical activity as well as nutrition and some personal development. I feel drawn to it but also know I likely won’t be able to complete it. I want to though. I am thinking about it.
XO,
Shelby